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Saturday, 25 February 2012


This week has been one of those horrible, stressful weeks. Work has been so busy it has felt at times like I have had no time to breathe, and there has definitely been no time for the brain to recover. Every situation has seemed to require me to be in 'top performance mode' whilst inside my head has been struggling to think straight. There is no place to hide when you are in charge of a meeting. By mid week it all felt too much, and tears started the day, stress turning everything to its most extreme.
But then Friday came, and suddenly there was space. I had a few hours on Friday to myself, a chat with Em, glass of wine followed by the guilty pleasure of watching Pride and Prejudice. Coils slowly release. Unwind. Time to breathe.
Today the weather is beautiful, clear blue sky, sun and the optimism of spring. I have still got shed loads of work to-do, but perspective is regained. Bliss.


Tuesday, 21 February 2012


today i got a phone call from my five year old niece. "do you want to come and have pancakes at our house tonight?" pancakes at my sisters house is not a once a year event.  pancake day at their house happens around every two weeks. in fact this was ten days ago.

but today is shrove tuesday. pancakes were the order of the day. and aunties were invited. pancakes were tossed. hitting the ceiling in the process. "do that again". 
this was today.

today was good. sticky but good.


Sunday, 19 February 2012


this week has been busy. two hands have been required at most times. when they were not this is what i snapped.

a birthday cake with so many candles it caught fire.

half term homework fun with makeshift counters.

cuddles from the youngest nephew,

peep-bo with the oldest. 

weekend lunch with a friend. tulips on the table. my favourite.

Saturday, 11 February 2012

letting go of control

these past few weeks i have been musing again on the landscape of life. it has been a recurring theme since jane and i first talked about it back in march last year. jane wrote a blog entry asking can you change your landscape or is it how you walk within it. my landscape has changed since this first conversation. challenging it may have been but it has allowed me to look at how i feel about control. as jane asked can you control your landscape or not?  for me it has been my ability to walk within the landscape. dealing with what has been handed to me and how i choose to act or react. learning about myself has been my biggest eye opener. things you can hide from other people but not yourself. facing up to issues big or small, painful or pleasurable, challenging or easy. all those things truthfully have enabled me to walk and walk tall, with grace within my landscape. the landscape changes. it has hills and dales. it has land and sea. it has sunshine and showers. within it; the best of times and the worst of times. i have also learnt it has hope, love and friendship if you have faith enough to look and want to find it. it is not something that can be dismissed. or it can. but at your peril. the landscape has a natural order. try and walk in a direction that is contrary to where the landscape wants you to go and the going gets harder. hills become mountains, bright sunshine grey. this much i have learnt. and having learnt that i no longer want to go my own way. well sometimes i do. especially when the going is hard. but i remember the happiness i feel within myself. i embrace the knowledge that enables me to trust and move forward. no matter how hard. it is meant for good. i am a control freak. letting go of control was hard. to keep doing it, harder. but i do it. open to what it teaches me. the battle at times seems lost. it is not. keep going. keep walking. i guarantee faith is rewarded. once you let go of what it is meant to reward you with. 


Winter Sun

Today we went for a walk. The snow is still around, and it is freezing cold, the kind of cold that gets inside you. But this afternoon in the sun it was beautiful

The best part was the ducks- the river in places is frozen...for them winter means they really can walk on water....

And that seems quite appealing:)


Thursday, 9 February 2012

i heart kevin bridges

last night i watched kevin bridges: what's the story and i laughed hard. for those of you who don't know kevin is a stand up comedian from glasgow. growing up my brother and i used to go to visit our aunt, uncle and cousins in glasgow during the summer holidays. my mum would put us on a bus at chorlton street manchester and they would pick us up at buchanan street glasgow. the funniest journey? when a suitcase fell off the overhead luggage rack whilst in transit and hit a lady whose make up made her look like bette davies in whatever happened to baby jane. i think kevins brand of humour reminds me of those days. days hanging out with my cousins telling tall tales, stories and jokes. they were excellent at all. every one of them. anyway this is the first part of a six parter. i highly recommend. check it out.


Sunday, 5 February 2012

Snow Part 2

Friends came round. Normally my 14 year old doesn't play much with the younger children, just because the age gap shows. To-day snow was the great unifier. Making snowmen, however old you are is still the best.


Saturday, 4 February 2012


They promised snow all day...this evening it arrived.
At 11pm the snowman was complete...and somehow it seemed fine to be making a snowman at nearly midnight...to-day was making the most of the day to the very end. Cold but happy we collapsed into bed.


popping in for tea

i love unexpected. especially good unexpected. yesterday morning i woke to a text. "Aey and I might pop around for cup of tea saturday". i have friends who live in far flung places. andy is one of those. bangkok. thailand. what i love about our friendship? no matter how long it has been since we last saw or spoke to each other, we always chat as if we saw each other yesterday. we chat and laugh with ease. the years teach you how special that is. this time we worked out it was only 9 months between visits. last time spring. this time winter. this was the view of my garden while they were here.

it started snowing.

Aey had never seen snow falling before.

it was lovely to see the excited reaction to something i look at and think "i hope it doesn't stick".

they are off to see manchester city play fulham. they will be freezing. they only flew in yesterday. no time to acclimatise for this pair. 

they are off on a tour around europe. happy holidays. travel safe.

i hope it's only another 9 months until the next visit.


Thursday, 2 February 2012

look what arrived today...

and with the delectable lana del rey as the cover star. 

loved her first single video games. check it out. on first watch i thought she had a look of a young priscilla presley. what do you think?

can't wait to get the time to sit down and read it. cover to cover. perfect.